


something for the imagination

by briwookie



Category: South Park
Genre: Drabble Collection, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2018-10-19 13:05:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10640433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/briwookie/pseuds/briwookie
Summary: Kyle and Cartman never got along - unless they were throat-to-throat, and tension could only turn into need.Collection of NSFW drabbles taken from my Tumblr account.





	1. i. new routine

**Author's Note:**

> This collection is as the summary encloses - a bunch of naughty drabbles featuring Kyle and Cartman from South Park. They're aged up, of course, and anything goes! 
> 
> Please do not request drabble ideas with the comment section. If you want to request something please send me something on Tumblr, preferably a part of a prompt list with a number and specific prompt.

This had been turned more into a routine than Eric Cartman had originally anticipated.

There was no surprise that the tension that fueled the two boys since kindergarten years had transcended into some kind of sexual awakening, which Cartman had to relate to something spiritual with the way Kyle would moan above him as they rode into oblivion. He wasn’t sure how much longer the king-sized bed he had would take it. Kyle coming over every night and making paint scratches on the wall had to be an eyebrow-raiser, but Liane had her own treasury of nighttime hush-hushes, so Cartman told himself it might as well be worth the ride. 

And worth it, it certainly was, when the big boy had an idea as Kyle was panting underneath him.

“Get on your hands and knees.” Cartman ordered. 

Kyle once offered eons ago to be on top but when Cartman gave him the cockiest expression in return, the Jew learned to keep his mouth shut. 

Well, except when Cartman told him to scream as loud as his lungs would allow him.

Kyle stilled for a second, not sure what Cartman was envisioning but he complied, pressing his hands against the mattress and clutching the sheets for dear life. Cartman trailed a finger down Kyle’s back, loving how spine could break into flesh. He trailed down that path and gave it kisses, where Kyle sighed because the poor boy didn’t know any better. 

If there was one thing Eric Cartman was, he was a rough love-maker, and Kyle witnessed it first-hand. Well, many hands, if they were being honest.

“You just going to keep up with foreplay or what, Fatass?”

“This is the least intense part of our workout, babe.” Cartman commented as he started pumping his own dick. “By the time I’m through with you, you’re not gonna wanna say ‘foreplay’ ever again.”

“Then you might as well get to it instead of talking.” Kyle replied, and as soon as the words left his mouth, a hand slapped his ass. 

He hissed and Cartman _loved_ it, so he did it again. The red spot would probably stay there come morning, and if it was longer, he was sure he’d get his ear off for it. He already accepted those hickies from earlier in their expedition would already cause a freakout, but Cartman hardly minded.

If it proved to those other losers that Broflovski was _his_ , it was worth it.

Cartman moved towards Kyle’s back and felt his ass with his hands as he trailed his tongue down, down and further down until he reached the goldmine. A beautiful asshole was waiting, just for him, and he was sure to have the exploration of his life. 

Kyle froze and made a quiet sound as Cartman parted his ass cheeks and started prepping the hole with his tongue. This made the other boy squeal in delight as he grabbed those sheets tighter, until his palms were even more white than they were in the Colorado freeze. 

Kyle never admiited it to him but Cartman knew he loved rimming, so he made tongue-fucking a routine in almost every intercourse. 

He drove deeper, actually getting inside and wrapping his arms around Kyle’s bent legs as he enjoyed every second, every moan to escape those torn-apart lips. Kyle sighed as Cartman finished fucking him and stood up on his knees. He glanced over his shoulder and found a smirk on Cartman’s face. It was hard for the two of them to not stare at one another’s hard dicks.

“Gotta say, that definitely is a highlight but my ass is feeling pretty lonely.” Cartman slithered and he smiled wider when Kyle followed suit, trailing two hands hungrily up Cartman’s chest.

“Say no more.”

With that, Kyle stopped for Cartman to lay down on his back, waiting for Kyle to come down to kiss him. 

They gave each other rough kisses, almost like the first kiss they ever shared in the dark hallways of South Park High when the other boys had gone home and one fight turned into a hand on someone’s dick (they could hardly remember who) and insults into lustful “give me more,” or “fuck, you really are good.”

When old habits _do_ die hard, they are still wet and grasping in your palm.

When Kyle turned around and presented his asshole to him again, Cartman didn’t hesitate to fuck him before Kyle got a chance to start. 

Kyle cursed, something about Cartman being impatient, but there were no more words when Cartman felt something wet as he lifted his legs. _This really was a workout_ , Cartman thought to himself as he felt the burn in his thighs while Kyle helped himself. He wondered how much longer it would take for Kyle to come but his thoughts froze as Kyle’s tongue went from the bottom of his dick to his asshole. 

He whined, bringing a hand to twist one of Kyle’s nipples in the frustration he couldn’t see that face for himself.

Kyle was always noisier than he was. That was a given, Cartman knew since the first time they had sex, but it was always evident and he always came back to it. Cartman smacked his ass again and could feel the glare coming off Kyle’s face. He always loved messing with him.

Eventually, Cartman’s tongue was too much and Kyle broke away and gasped as he released all over Cartman’s bed. He didn’t stop paying attention to Cartman though, and made sure the other boy got his turn. When Cartman came, he didn’t like announcing it, he felt like Kyle could always tell when he was about to unleash his load, and this was no exception. Coming on Kyle’s chest, he took a deep breath as Kyle lifted himself up and wiped his mouth.

“You should consider yourself lucky I don’t find this disgusting.”

“And what? The burgers you ate years ago tasted like shit?” Cartman asked before getting a pillow in his face.

"Shut up and fuck me."


	2. ii. motel lovin'

When Randy had mentioned a summer weekend trip to the national park, the boys weren’t sure what to anticipate. 

Going camping was something fun years ago, when they were barely ready to enter middle school and they had their entire lives ahead of them. High school and camping didn’t sit well, and this was evident on the ride to the motel. 

Kyle was sitting next to Kenny and Cartman in the back, hardly able to look at the boy that snuck him a kiss less than a week ago. An argument after gym had led to Cartman cornering him too closely, and it wasn’t as if Kyle pushed him away, but the way he melted into the kiss and how Cartman’s hands roamed on his hips and tugged him into his grasp…

Kyle shivered at the memory tried to avert his vision to the other side of the seat.

Cartman was either looking back at him, or he was but he chickened out and became fixated with the highway. Kyle sighed to himself, awkwardness bubbling inside of him.

The hours to the motel had passed, and once they were inside of their room, it smelled of weed and stench. They dropped off their bags and Stan went back outside to order pizza.

“Well, kids, I’m heading out for a drink. Feel free to do whatever, just don’t fuck up the place.” Randy said and Kenny jumped up at the chance to join him. 

Kyle rolled his eyes knowing that Kenny didn’t have to bother with an I.D., he hit into his body as soon as they entered high school and nobody ever carded him.

When Kyle managed to get into his swimsuit and head towards the hot tub, he sighed as the hot water ran over his skin. He stayed there, content for a few minutes before noticing the knob to turn on the bubbles by the gate, and he got up to turn them on. 

He couldn’t even remember the last time he stayed at a place like this, and as the bubbles started to soak in his red hair, he closed his eyes.

He could hear something on the other side and he opened his eyes as Cartman came in with his own towel. He had grown taller in the span of a couple years, almost hitting over six feet. Kyle had to not be so envious, but it’d be nice if all of his friends didn’t turn into giants. 

The bigger boy threw his towel on one of the chairs before he ran into the room and did a cannonball. Kyle winced as some of the cold water came into the hot tub, and Cartman grinned from the pool.

“I bet that hot tub doesn’t even have hot water.” He said and Kyle scoffed at that.

“Why would I stay in here if the water isn’t warm, dumbass?”

“Because it’d be warmer than the pool.” Cartman replied as he swam to the edge of the pool and crossed his arms over the concrete. The two looked at one another for a second before Kyle coughed.

“You having fun there?”

“Come in here with me,” Cartman splashed some of the water towards Kyle who flipped him off.

“Why would I want to do that? I’d rather not freeze my ass off.”

Cartman started swimming back to the middle of the pool. “I mean, if you’re not up to it then I guess I can have the entire pool to myself.”

Kyle’s eyesbrows rose at that comment and he felt bitter. He hated passing on a challenge, even if it meant he secretly wondered if Cartman would try to make a move on him like before. 

He groaned and got out of the tub, watching the smile on Cartman’s face grow bigger. Pressing one of his feet into the water, he shrieked and backed away, Cartman laughing in response.

“Dude! The water’s going to be cold as fuck no matter what, you might as well just get in.”

“Shut up! You’re used it to by now.” Kyle yelled back and he frowned at the water again. 

Eventually he decided to just go with it, and he made his way into the shallow end. He shivered as water reached chest-level and he took a deep breath before he sunk his body. Not even a second later he broke free from the surface .

“God! What the fuck, it’s the _summer_ …”

Cartman howled and grabbed his stomach. He waited for Kyle to stand next to him before the two of them lingered in the cool water, looking up at the sky. Stars stretched, more than Kyle could collect from his home. Cartman glanced at Kyle to the side.

“I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to go.”

Kyle heard Cartman say this and he looked back with a still expression. 

Cartman lowered himself in the water.

“I mean, we haven’t done a trip like this in a long time.”

“I feel like it’s been since we were nine, running around and doing things like this together.” Kyle agreed. He felt Cartman come closer to him and he hadn’t realized how bright the lights were on the sides of the pool until he could see the reflection of Cartman’s stomach against the water, ripples and small waves bouncing against it.

“Why are we doing this?” Kyle asked out loud. Cartman raised an eyebrow and Kyle gritted his teeth.

“I mean, why are just pretending what happened back there didn’t happen? You know that it doesn’t affect you alone, right?” Kyle found the words escaping his mouth faster than wildfire. Cartman’s face turned from confusion to reluctance, and he lowered his gaze to his hands, playing in the water.

“I was just really mad at you.”

“I was mad at you too, but then we…”

“We, uh.” Cartman finished for him and wet his lips. Kyle blinked towards him and made a small smile. It didn’t look like either of them could grapple this.

“That kiss was something I didn’t anticipate.” Kyle said and Cartman looked back at him and nodded. After a few seconds of silence, Kyle continued.

“But it didn’t mean that I…didn’t enjoy it.” Kyle finished. There was another second of silence before Cartman coughed into his hand.

“Did you…?” Cartman stopped himself and cursed under his breath. Kyle watched as the other boy made his way towards him and put his hands on Kyle’s shoulders.

There was a mutual uncertainty in their eyes as Cartman leaned in, pressing their lips together in some quiet confirmation of experimentation. They leaned into one another, as Cartman opened his mouth and waited for Kyle to accept his tongue. They kissed deeper as Cartman clawed Kyle’s back, and Kyle felt himself grow blank as Cartman’s cock rubbed against his own in the room. When they both enjoyed that feeling, starry-eyed at the new sensations, 

Cartman put his hands on Kyle’s hips as he did before and pressed their cocks against one another.

Kyle sighed as Cartman stole another frantic kiss, going into that routine of arousal neither of them had experience as readily as then. Eventually, Kyle groaned and could feel something start to reach his peak, before the two boys heard something in the distance.

“The pizzas are here! Kyle, Cartman where the hell are you guys?”

Both of them froze as Stan’s voice echoed across the parking lot to where the pool was, and Cartman looked at Kyle with an awkwardness.

“We should go back.” He whispered and Kyle frowned.

“Okay but maybe we can come back…when everyone else is asleep?” 

He watched Cartman’s face light up at that and the boy smirked in response.

“If you could keep it to yourself ‘till then.”


	3. iii. fem! your mouth is pretty good

A hot afternoon – that was a first in a long line of mediocre sun-burners. Kylie Broflovski thought so, as she leaned against her girlfriend’s bed and tried to fan herself.

A college-ruled note with endless doodles was open, remnants of their chemistry homework popping out behind images of raccoon and kite-inspired supergals. She had no idea why Erica based her wannabe-superhero identity on a racoon, but originality points?

Erica was laying on her bed and staring up at the ceiling, throwing a bubblegum wrapper in the air and catching it again. Kyle scrunched her face at the ‘pop!’ and she turned her head. Erica followed suit and smirked below.

“Still procrastinating?”

“Oh, whatever. Don’t act like you’ve gotten anything done either.” Kylie glared while Erica swallowed her gum and threw the wrapper at her face, a small ball that bounced off her nose and fell off the floor.

“I mean, I’ve gotten some things done.”

“Being lazy and waiting for me to finish so you can copy me?” Kylie grinned, watching Erica fall back and bring a hand to her chest.

“Me? Use other people for my own purposes? Who do you take me for?”

Kylie shook her head. “If you have time to accept your own weaknesses then you have time to help with these bonds.” The redhead lifted her notebook to where Erica could see it and the other girl groaned.

“Chemistry is so hard, and so useless…”

“How is chemistry useless?” Kylie scoffed. “Without chemistry we wouldn’t be able to-“

“Oh! But I see you were drawing our characters!” Erica interrupted and practically jumped off the bed. She made a pose, lifting an arm over her eyes as if she were disguising herself.

“The Coon and the Human Kite! Dashing through the streets of South Park in the dead of night, saving the lives of millions…”

“More like thousands,” Kylie said and Erica paused before continuing.

“…Thousands of those in peril, including old hags and cute kittens stuck in trees!”

“Just make sure you don’t refer to them as old hags, that’s not the best way to spread our names.” Kylie pondered, bringing her hand to her chin. “Although I guess saving kittens would be the best first step…”

“Kittens rank of the most importance.” Erica stated. “People can just wait to be rescued.”

“How is that even logical?” Kylie laughed and Erica walked towards her and sat next to her.

She pressed her shoulder against Kylie’s arm and the two girls looked at one another. Erica leaned in and gave Kylie a quick peck, pressing their noses together.

“It would be so fun. We could be superheroes at night and then at day…” She made her move and kissed inside Kylie’s neck, her teeth teasing porcelain skin.

“Two crazy girls obsessed with each other.”

“We’d still be like that at night.” Kylie sighed as Erica drover her hands underneath Kylie’s tanktop.

While the brunette fondled with Kylie’s breasts, she went back in for a kiss, a slow dance of lips and tongues as Kylie digested the scent of vanilla. She wondered how messy it would be if a coon got tangled in her strings.

It’d be impossible to escape.

Erica snickered at her girlfriend’s comment while she gently pushed her down, starting to unbutton Kyle’s denim shorts. She pulled the tank over her shoulders and bit down on one of her shoulders, eliciting a moan.

She moved down with peppered kisses, down to her naval. Eventually before Erica pulled the shorts off, but spread those legs and Kylie flushed.

“We have work to do!”

“You didn’t complain before.” Erica whipped back as the shorts flew off. They landed on the floor besides them and Erica smiled at the green panties.

She rubbed one of her thumbs along the center, gently crossing over the clitoris. Kylie bit down her lower lip as Erica moved a hand underneath. Her two index fingers prodded her clit as her other hand went to the back and started pulling the fabric down. Kylie sighed and shuddered at the cold contact. She’d have to thank the lack of fans and good air-conditioning.

“Time to get you naked.” Erica grinned mischeviously. Kylie clicked her teeth with her mouth.

“And you’re going to stay fully dressed?”

“This isn’t about me, darling.” Erica reminded as the panties laid right next to the shorts.

She pressed her mouth against one of Kylie’s thighs and said something under her breath Kylie couldn’t hear. Words transformed into actions as Erica made a stretch with her tongue – pressing it against the bottom of Kylie’s clitoris. The redhead sighed while her head fell back against the bed. She moaned and dragged her fingernails into Erica’s bob.

“My mom is downstairs.” Erica approached, watching a familiar spark appear in Kylie’s eyes.

“She’s going to care?”

“Probably not.” Erica shrugged to herself as she continued.

After a few minutes of licking Kylie’s clit, she raised two of her fingers to Kylie’s mouth. The other girl stared cautiously before she accepted and put her mouth on the two digits. She sucked them, teasing the space between with her tongue and Erica chuckled.

“Good girl.” She mumbled as she lowered the wet hand to Kylie’s vagina and rubbed the entrance.

She continued prepping as she put her mouth back down and Kylie spread her legs out further. Erica took the clitoris in between her lips and motioned her tongue harder, feeling Kylie start to shake as her fingers went inside.

“Erica, please…’ Kylie said, breathless. Erica smirked as she went lower and circled her tongue around Kylie’s vaginal entrance. She replaced her fingers with her mouth and grabbed Kylie’s hips with her hands and thrusted her tongue inside. Kylie was gasping, and Erica couldn’t have been surprised to find blood near her scalp when this over.

Eventually Kylie cried out wordlessly as orgasm came and went, but Erica continued having her way for a short period afterwards. The brunette sat up and licked her lips, amused at the blotchy face looking back at her.

“That’s what I’d like to call a chemical reaction.”

Kylie sighed as she pushed Erica to the ground for another kiss.


	4. iv. fit for a king

The Grand Wizard was beyond startled.

He couldn’t remember how, but his base had been invaded, and the memories and images collided in his mind. There was nothing but a blank slate as his eyes opened, exposing a near vacant room. Eric Cartman squirmed in his seat, eyes widening at the restraints on his legs and his arms. He rummaged around and tried to escape, even trying to pick up the chair.

“Whoever the fuck is behind this, come here so I can beat your ass!”

Cartman shouted into what seemed like thin air. There was no response and his patience was wearing thin. He had an idea of who could have been behind this and when he saw that Jew’s face, it’d be plastered all over the walls.

“You’re going to regret this.” Cartman hissed as he concentrated, using all of his might as his magic built up in his asshole. He scrunched his face as his power was about to unleash.

_Take this you fucking day walker._

As he attempted to fart up a storm, Cartman could only let out a sliver of a toot. He gaped, looking at his behind in disgust.

“What the fuck? Burning Cloud always works!”

He heard a laugh from the other side of the room and Cartman glared as someone walked out of the shadows. 

The High Jew King himself was in front of him, and he was laughing his ass off.

“Dude, you should know that Burning Cloud doesn’t work here. I’m surprised you even thought that was a logical approach.”

“Shut the fuck up, Elf King! How was I supposed to know this room would block my amazing magical abilities?”

Kyle only returned the question with a deadpan expression. “Magical abilities?”

“What, and you think your little metal stick does better?” Cartman quipped, smirking as Kyle fumed.

“Your powers literally come from _farts_ , fatass.”

“They’re legitimate abilities that come from the body and isn’t some lame ass attachment, _Tony Stark_!”  

The wizard shifted in his seat uncomfortably. If it wasn’t for the fact that the two of them had been playing this game since they were kids , he would have gotten way more pissed. Now he was just annoyed, feeling the soreness in his arms.

“Tony Stark has a bodily application that- you know what, never mind. I should just leave you in here to rot.” Kyle said as he was about to turn and leave. Eric scoffed at that, leaning forward in the chair.

“So you’re just going to leave after chaining me up like that? You and the other lameass elves already got what you wanted, Kupa Keep and the stick to boot! What’s the point of even throwing me in this room like some interrogation?”

Kyle turned smoothly and smiled. 

“I mean, getting everything we could want is certainly a highlight. But if you think I’m satisfied, you really don’t know how this game works.”

Cartman was really confused now. He lifted an eyebrow.

“What are you talking about?”

“Well, Grand Wizard King,” Kyle started as he walked towards the other boy, knocking off the blue hat off his head as he did so, “how often is it that I see you as vulnerable and helpless as you are right now?”

Cartman was going to retort but Kyle already pressed himself into the other boy’s lap. He ghosted his face near Cartman’s cheek, lingering as his hands roamed to the cloth around the king’s waist. He untied it and brought it to Cartman’s eyes, tying it around.

“Kyle, what the fuck…?”  
  


“Shh.” Kyle whispered back. “You don’t need to talk anymore.”

Cartman licked his lips as complete darkness replaced his vision. He wasn’t used to giving up the reins of control, even if he had fantasized it before. Looks like Kyle could step into his mind at times, not like he’d complain. 

Two kings had to give and take some of the power.

“Just leave the rest to me, and if I hear a peep out of you there _will_ be punishment.”

Cartman was about to bite back but Kyle reached him to it, pressing his mouth against Cartman’s neck.

He was now sitting on Cartman’s lap, hands exploring underneath the cloak that still fit to this day. The brunette sighed, egging Kyle to explore further. Once the hard bites ceased, and the realization Cartman was going to hide his neck under a scarf the next day passed through their minds, Kyle started the process of taking off the boy’s clothes. 

However he couldn’t remove everything with the restraints so he sighed.

“Looks like we’ll have to keep some clothes on after all. Spread your legs.” Kyle ordered. 

Cartman scoffed.

“You really think I’m gonna let you suck my dick if I’m like thi- _ow, fuck Kyle_!”

“I _told_ you to spread your legs. Don’t make me say it again!” 

Kyle twisted the nipple he held onto harder. Cartman bit his lower lip in annoyance before he slowly separated his thighs. Kyle pressed them further with the lack of compliance on Cartman’s part, and was able to push the wizard’s boxers down enough to unleash his dick. It was already wet and part and fit comfortable in his hand.

“It’s so fucking cold in here.” Cartman mumbled and Kyle smacked his thigh in response.

“ _Quit_ talking, Jesus!” Kyle made Cartman shut up by putting his mouth on the other boy’s dick.

It throbbed at the sensation and Cartman gritted his teeth. He was dying to get this cloth off his face and see the elf suck him off for real instead of just play it with his imagination. Kyle went slowly at first, moving up and down with precision before it became harder, rushed with pleasure. Cartman couldn’t help but sigh even if Kyle would smack him for doing so. Kyle eventually released him and Cartman whined.

“I was about to come.” He complained, and Kyle chuckled.

“You were, huh? I think you don’t deserve to come, for being so noisy. It’s my turn.”

Cartman heard Kyle shuffle in front of him before he could feel something wet in front of him against his mouth. It was Kyle’s dick and the edge was pressed against his lips.

“Suck me off and I _might_ let you come.”

Cartman didn’t say a word of rebuttal, taking the entire dick in his mouth. 

Kyle groaned as Cartman sucked him fast. It was easy for Cartman who had been used to having this dick in his mouth several times before, but in the small room they were in, Kyle’s echoes bounced off the walls. The elf pushed in further, causing Cartman to choke.

“Take it all in.” Kyle ordered and when Cartman did just that, Kyle grabbed that brown hair and tugged.

“ _Harder_ , fatass.”

Cartman groaned at the assertiveness and before long, he felt Kyle release inside of his mouth. Kyle sighed as he grabbed Cartman’s dick and started pumping until the both of them had finished. They took deep breaths as Kyle reached around Cartman’s face and took the sleeve off.

“That was kind of fun. Why hadn’t we done that before?”

“Because it was stupid and I felt like a fucking slave.” Cartman huffed. Kyle laughed at that and threw the sleeve on the ground.

“Oh, come on. You enjoyed it a little.”

“Not really. I was afraid you were going to stick your golf club up my ass.” Cartman glared as Kyle messed around with the restaints.

Once Cartman was free, he tied his cloak back up.

“Not like you’re new to having things up there.” Kyle muttered and Cartman groaned at previous memories.

“Well, looks like in the future the wizard will have some tricks of his own – ones that _will_ involve magic being used!”

“Gross, dude.”


	5. v. sports suck but not as good as you

The sound of a locker closing echoed through the shower room as Kyle slammed it with as much anger as he could pent up. 

His socks were soggy as sweat ran down his legs and he grimaced at the idea of throwing them in the wash. 

It wasn’t as if he sought out taking Track and Field during high school – his mother begged him to do something other than basketball and there was no way in hell football was an option. He would’ve gotten smashed, even from the skinnier guys who all just happened to be towers above him. Who came up with the idea that running competitively was so enjoyable people would sit down just to watch other do it, anyways?

Kyle snorted at the idea, people clapping in the stands as he made his final lap. 

Kyle Broflovski, the diabetic kid who was really around jogging around that inner corner.

There could have been worse things, he supposed. He could have been one of the unfortunate folks who had to use their weight to throw and toss things, and the image of picking up a metal ball and throwing it into an open field was extremely unpleasant. 

Good thing they have the people here who could do it.

“Jew.”

Speak of the devil.

“You’re not staying until six?” Kyle turned to find Cartman walking in behind him, the top portion of his numbered shirt drenched. Normally it would make Kyle grossed out but it didn’t phase him with his boyfriend. Well, almost boyfriend. He wasn’t sure what the hell they were, except they had been sleeping around the past few weeks, months? Some number that Kyle couldn’t keep track of since they went over to their houses for ‘study sessions’ every other night.

“Coach wants us to head home early since the meet is tomorrow.” Cartman started taking off his shirt and throwing it in his own locker. Kyle scrunched his nose and at the expression Cartman snickered.

“You act like I don’t have a spare at home.”

“Well what am I supposed to think when you just throw your dirty clothes in your locker?”

“Oh right. I keep forgetting you’re actually my mom in disguise.” Cartman kicked off his shoes that were covered his dirt and torn at the sides. Kyle repeatedly told him to get a new pair but it didn’t look like that was sticking, either.

“Please don’t bring either your mom or mine into this.” Kyle huffed as he averted his stare from Cartman’s chest. “I’m still mad she made me get into this.”

“But you’re so cute running around the track, you look better than the other guys do and they do long-distance. Long-distance, Kyle.”

“Don’t make me throw this at you.” Kyle threatened to throw one of his socks at the other and before he took his clean pair of clothes out of his bag, he felt a tag on his arm. 

The brunette was now almost completely naked except for his boxers that hardly left any size to the imagination.

“Hey, the other guys aren’t coming in here and practice technically isn’t over until later so why don’t you and I get a little cleaned up?” His eyes traveled to an empty shower stall and Kyle blinked at him slowly.

“Are you serious right now? What if someone sees us, it’s not like we’re exactly out…”

Kyle had to stop himself before he said something he knew the both of them would regret. If he was going to be romantically rejected any time soon, now wouldn’t be the best time to do it. Cartman lifted his eyebrows for a second before he coughed, shaking it off.

“I mean, let’s just make it short. Nobody is going to come in and if they do…” 

Cartman leaned in close, the scent of Axe deodorant overpowering.

“We can be super quiet.”

Kyle glanced up and took a second before a playful smile replaced the distraction all over his face. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

Cartman took Kyle by the wrists and left their bags on the stall as he fumbled with the stall’s knob. He shimmed out of his boxers and waited for Kyle to do the same, leaning in and stealing a kiss. They fumbled into the shower, barely able to adjust the water to their liking.

Kyle was used to Cartman pushing him against a wall to get what he wanted. It was a part of the power complex he knew the other boy had, but he never thought it’d be a turn-on of his to be cornered so intimately. As Cartman gave Kyle a rough kiss, tugging his lower lip with his teeth, he reached for Kyle’s dick that was just starting to get excited. Kyle moaned and then laughed when it slipped out of his hand.

“Might have to grab it harder.” Kyle sighed as Cartman did just that, wrapping a hand around Kyle’s dick.

It’s a good thing he has big hands.

Cartman pressed himself closed to Kyle, picking him up so that Kyle could wrap his legs around his waist. Both boys groaned as Cartman started jacking Kyle off, and the mixture of hot water and smoke rising in the stall made Kyle’s skin flush. He grabbed Cartman by the shoulders, digging his fingernails deep.

“Fuck, Cartman.” Kyle moaned. His eyes closed as Cartman took a nipple in his mouth and started sucking. 

He could have said anything at that moment, the frenzy of sexual pursuits making him blank in the brain. Eventually after a couple of minutes of relentless pumping, Cartman watched as the semen coated his stomach. The brunette grinned at the sight, wiping some of the hair out of his eyes.

“Didn’t take you long.”

“Let me down and I’ll return the favor.” Kyle smirked, and Cartman choked at the invitation.

He lowered the other boy and gasped when Kyle got on his knees, taking Cartman’s cock in his mouth. Kyle had a feeling it would be big before he saw it the first time, but there was no way he was going to complain. After all, it had its uses. He started moving back and forth, hands squeezing Cartman’s hips. He felt two hands dig into his red hair and he chuckled, knowing full well it wouldn’t take long for Cartman to let loose.

“You’re returning the favor alright.” Cartman was barely able to say that, breathing in deep. Kyle didn’t take much time to come to his release, but if he knew Cartman, and he knew him, it wouldn’t take any time for Cartman to come into his mouth.

“Mm?” Kyle loved it when he talked while sucking dick. The vibrations were heavenly and it seemed like Cartman agreed. He went fasted while Cartman’s head hit the back of the wall.

“Goddammit.”

“Don’t take too much time.” Kyle said as he popped off for a short second, fondling Cartman’s balls with another hand. “The water’s starting to get cold.”

“I’ll take my damn time.” Cartman spit out. “You should suck my balls while you’re down there.”

“Someone’s a little needy.” Kyle whispered as he dragged his tongue down the shaft of Cartman’s dick. He lapped Cartman’s ball a few times before he could feel the other boy shake and shudder. He took the dick back into his mouth and finished Cartman off, the other boy cursing as his hands grabbed fistfuls of Kyle’s hair.

“Damn. You’re too good at that.” Cartman said as he lifted Kyle back up for another kiss. 

They had a slow make-out session before they could hear people from the outside of the changing room and they froze as Cartman turned off the water. 

“You wanna get out of here?” Kyle asked and Cartman didn’t hesitate as the two of them jumped out.

“Hey, let’s go back to my house.” He replied as they quickly changed. They sprinted out of the room in their clean clothes, and before the other boys could ask about the trail of wet footprints leading back into the gym, they were gone.


	6. vi. bathroom stalls are a cliche, but here's another one

He couldn’t remember how he ended up stuck in the men’s bathroom, pinned against the wall like a most prized possession. All he could do was take a deep breath as all life was sucked out of him – literally.

It’d only been mere minutes since class got out and Cartman’s mouth was already on his cock. If Kyle knew any better, he’d say the other boy was plenty experienced, claiming to have been ‘riled up’ since the end of Calculus. 

Whatever. Anytime words came out of his mouth Kyle would want him to shut up. 

Speaking of…

“You look pretty busy down there.” Kyle sighed as Cartman’s tongue teased, slowly crawling up from the back of his dick to the slit. Sometimes it was a blessing that the fatass loved showing shit in his mouth.

Cartman replied by smacking Kyle’s ass, to which he got a glare back.

“Dude! You’re not even trying to be subtle here.”

Cartman stopped for a second, a ‘pop’ heard as he wiped his mouth. 

“You’re talking about subtle with a slap but when I’m giving you the best blowjob you’ve ever had…” 

“Shh! Just shut up and finish what you started, damn!”

Kyle pressed his junk closer to Cartman’s face, who just rolled his eyes. When Cartman put the cock back in his mouth, he slipped a hand into those unbuttoned jeans that his favorite Jew was wearing, and played with a dark abyss only the two of them had permission to explore. Kyle moaned as a wandering finger prodded him.

“Cartman, fuck.”

He’s being the noisy one here. Cartman thought to himself as he gave himself some credit and started to play with himself, not wanting to admit those moans of submission did more than a physical fight could ever do. He grinned as he felt Kyle start to writhe, that familiar God help me expression covering his face.

Couldn’t hurt to suck a little harder.

“Cartman, wait, I think I’m coming…” Kyle gasped, hands deep in Cartman’s hair. 

Normally the brunette would take it but he smirked at the idea of having some fun. As he felt Kyle start to obvious approach orgasm, he pressed his thumb, hard, against the slit of his penis. Kyle panted and sent the other boy of pure hatred, Cartman’s favorite look.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“You come too easily.” Cartman made a slow movement on Kyle’s dick with his tongue, all while the boy was internally cursing him. “You need to have more control.”

“You’re seriously doing this now?” Kyle’s head hit the back of the bathroom wall and he whined, low in his throat. “We have ten minutes until lunch is over!”

“Then that’s just ten more minutes where you’ll have to hold it in.” Cartman ghosted over Kyle’s penis, continuing to run his tongue along the side while his hand tapped Kyle’s asshole. He sneaked a glance, and yup. He was definitely pissed. Cartman didn’t realize all the fun he was missing.

“If you don’t fucking suck me off right now, forget about me ever returning the favor, because it won’t happen!”

“Oh please. You’d be nothing without this hot piece of ass.” Cartman smiled, knowing Kyle would blow it now. He squeezed the cock that really looked like it couldn’t take the torture. Kyle smacked Cartman on the shoulder in response.

“You are a fucking dick!”

“Not the best choice of words concerning your situation, but sure.” Cartman wrapped a hand around Kyle’s balls, moist like a pair of wet balloons. Kyle whined again, only louder as it echoed in the stalls.

“Please, Cartman!”

“Please, what?” Cartman’s fingers were dancing around Kyle’s balls and cock.

“I want to come, please just let me come, dammit!”

“Well, since you’re making such a racket.” Cartman rolled his eyes. 

He wrote a note to himself to get this boy a Chasity belt as he swallowed Kyle’s dick, whole, and in less than five seconds, Kyle came and filled Cartman’s mouth. Once the boy spit out in the toilet, Kyle kicked him in the leg, barely able to curse with his face matching his hair.

“You are such a fucking asshole.”


	7. nut n' fruity

Even as he grew up, Cartman couldn't say he had a large sex drive.

He'd say that he was average, compared to the several guys that used to be in his grade that would have sex with their significant others every damn day of the calendar. He was by no means holy – he would whip it out good when he wanted, but there was nobody that really brought that side out of him. He claimed he had specific needs that would have to be required.

Knowing that one of those needs was to have an ass that would kill in skinny jeans, Cartman was impressed seeing it, firsthand, within seconds of arriving at the bar.

There was a guy on the other side, a cocktail glass in his hand, eyes so playfully teasing. Cartman prayed that the man liked bigger guys, or guys in general. Why was he jumping the fence so quickly? True, he liked to visualize all of the steps in advance, but it would be important to actually start a conversation. So, he did just that. He pushed himself towards the life of the party, who had a couple other men and women chatting next to him. The cutie with a mob of curly, red hair watched him the entire way and smiled when Cartman leaned against the counter.

Oh, he was so cute, he'd have all of those pretty buttons popped off when Cartman was done with him.

“Whatcha drinking?” Cartman took a glance, the glass almost empty with bits of fruit inside.

“Nut n' Fruity.” His voice was slick, articulating each syllable with effortless poise. Now Cartman couldn't stop thinking about nuts. He caught the eyes of the bartender and ushered him over.

“Get us two of more of that heart-stopper.” Cartman watched his new obsession as his eyesbrows raised. 

Tonight was going to be fun.

And it was, for the most part, until it got even better as five drinks were long forgotten and the alcohol remained. Cartman wanted to drag Kyle, a name that would otherwise be such a downer but held a rich taste in his mouth, to the floor and grind until their pants fell off, but he had a better idea: get this man naked ASAP. He ran his hand over Kyle's wrist, dark eyes promising, and without words the other man silently agreed. They fled from the social scene to the bathroom in the back, tiny and so cliché as far as bar bathrooms went. Writing covered the walls and the doors, and typically Cartman considered himself a classy guy, but he was so horny he could barely stand it.

Cartman dragged a hand into Kyle's pants and found a hard dick in his waiting. He felt his own boner rise at the idea of it being like that for the past couple hours. Kyle sighed in absolute majesty, his head tipping backwards as Cartman unzipped those skinny jeans, fuck how did his ass look so good in those...

There was no hesitation as Cartman put his mouth to work. He had been complimented for it in the past, but he could have stayed down on his knees for an entire lifetime. Kyle was purring underneath him, his hands clutching brown hair and moans so loud the entire building could hear them. Cartman didn't care, he loved it when people were noisy. He wrapped a hand around Kyle's leg and squeezed, teasingly. Kyle chuckled, his breath mixed with champagne and pomegranate. 

“You taking your time down there?”

“I don't need your attitude, little man.” Cartman replied. Kyle was the same age as he was, apparently, but didn't mean he couldn't be teased for his height.   
He took a long lick from the end to the tip of Kyle's raging cock, and he grinned at Kyle's swear. He would do anything to have words ceaselessly come out of that mouth.

When he kept his mouth on Kyle's dick, he was surprised to see how long Kyle would last. Eventually, Kyle cried out for release and Cartman split, his hand replacing his mouth during the final frontier. He quickly moved his hand up and down and watched as the semen covered the lower half of his face. He wiped his chin and pressed Kyle against the wall and kissed him deeply, biting the bottom lip and sucking. 

The fruit was a nice aftertaste, as was the number that would last much longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I continue getting Tumblr NSFW prompts, I will keep posting these! This one's a little shorter, hope you don't mind! Thanks!


	8. bonded for life

Kyle felt the air knocked right out of him. Two hands were gripping his shoulders, pressing him against a graffit-covered wall, and Kyle thought he was surely going to die. Cartman’s strength was not one to underestimate, and he looked down at Kyle with fingers digging into flesh. Kyle’s tongue was stuck to the roof of his mouth and he was about to say his last prayers before something came down. A pair of lips collided with his own. Kyle couldn’t process a thought as Cartman leaned forward, moving a leg between Kyle’s thighs. His mouth was hot and fast, tongue brushing on Kyle’s lips before they broke apart. Cartman attempted to catch his breath.

“You really piss me off.” He said, and Kyle wanted to slap him if his shoulders weren’t like drying cement.

He didn’t even understand what he said to cause such a reaction but Cartman didn’t give him a chance to speak before kissing him again. The knee between Kyle’s legs was rubbing against his dick and Kyle felt his face flush red. Cartman’s mouth was beginning to find a rhythm with their kisses and Kyle couldn’t push back, so he accepted it. He even found himself kissing back, greedy hands wrapping themselves in Cartman’s hair.

Cartman’s leg was now actively exciting Kyle, pushing hard against the aroused dick in Kyle’s pants.

Kyle groaned when Cartman left to give attention to his neck. He bit down on the skin near Kyle’s collarbone, which caused Kyle to yelp. He was going to flip Cartman off so much tomorrow for giving him these potential bruises. Before Cartman went lower, Kyle felt a pounding sensation in his head. It wasn’t harmful but it was strong, and pushed Cartman off. The other boy complied but gave a puzzled look.

“I feel really weird about this.” Kyle ran a hand through his hair and Cartman scoffed.

“Of course you would, why the fuck do I do these things? I always…”

“No, no. Stop. This isn’t about _that_ , I just have this pounding in my head that just started happening.”

Cartman shuffled where he stood and an awkward stare came.

“What, are you sick?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Kyle shrugged. “It’s just…when you started kissing me and even a little after, it’s been nonstop.”

“Maybe we should…” Cartman started, before his face turned distorted. He pressed one of his hands against his forehead and groaned.

“Cartman?”

“I think it’s happening to _me_ , too.” Cartman said. “It doesn’t hurt, though. It’s just a pain in the ass and it keeps like, throbbing.”

“We should get out of here and see someone about this.” Kyle sighed and Cartman shook his head.

“I don’t think there’s going to be anything they can do about it. I mean, it doesn’t hurt you, right?”

“No.” Kyle said. “But it’s still strange.”

“Then maybe it’s fine.” Cartman didn’t let Kyle interrupt him. “It’s just something we’re going to have to get used to.”

“…you sure?” Kyle asked and Cartman shrugged.

“Not like there’s been weirder things.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is pretty short. I might post more in the next couple of days - depends on if I get more requests from the prompt list I recently reblogged. Anyways, enjoy!


	9. morning epiphany

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't updated this in a while so if I have other NSFW stuff from my blog, I'll put it on here.
> 
> This one isn't as NSFW as the others, but I marked it as such so I'll be positing it on here for you guys.

The feeling was that of a cinder block, falling down from the sky just to land on Kyle’s head. He took a deep breath, glazed his eyes over his naked body, and froze. There was no way this could have happened, but there was no denying it that Kyle and Cartman just had sex. 

Kyle glanced over his shoulder, watching Cartman brush tiny red hairs off of his chest.  _No, no, no._ Thoughts and emotions ran at hundreds of miles an hour, with the same words repeating itself in Kyle’s head:  _what the fuck have you done, what in the actual fuck have you done?_

“It’s uh, pretty chilly in here.” Kyle muttered. He was actually trembling,  _what the fuck-_

“…that’s an icebreaker, I guess.” Cartman rolled his eyes while he walked over to his fan. Kyle looked down at the sheets, soiled from his release just minutes earlier. He could feel his mind shift and turn, with the knowledge that he’d go home and  _smell_ like him.

“I don’t know why you wouldn’t have mentioned this earlier.” Cartman said. He turned down the settings and it helped, for a second.

“It wasn’t cold before.” Kyle said, and Cartman scoffed.

“Well, obviously, because you and I were-”

“ _Don’t_ say anything.” Kyle raised a hand. He could feel a migraine coming on and his face felt hot. He needed to get out of here.

“What’s the matter with you? You were enjoying yourself from what I saw.” Cartman sat back down on the bed, his face too close for comfort. 

Kyle averted his gaze to his jeans that were on Cartman’s floor. He remembered that it only took two seconds for Cartman to pull them off.

“I mean, yeah it felt great. But I don’t really know how what we should…do now?” Kyle couldn’t believe that words weren’t coherently tying themselves together in his head. All he could think of were the flashes of images of the two of them fucking each other, patches of red and white from their skin and greedy tongues. 

He did love every second of it, that was the shocking part. In what universe would Kyle ever think having sex with Cartman was better than anyone else? 

“Why does there need to be something after this?” Cartman shrugged to himself. “I don’t really think we should have to worry about it.”

“But why don’t you worry about it? Aren’t you going to think about us having sex when we see each other from now?” Kyle was starting to get irritated. Cartman was never a guy to be shy from intimacies with others, sure, but did he really think this was going to be washed over easily?

_Does he even want to wash it away?_

“Kyle,” Cartman grabbed him by the shoulder. “I don’t think it would be wise for either of us to let this to get our heads. I mean, who cares if we fool around? We were both turned on and acted on what we felt was right - like we always do.” Cartman cracked a grin.

“How can you just be  _okay_ with this?” Kyle asked. 

“It’s not like I haven’t wanted this for a while.” Cartman looked away, and Kyle felt his face grow hot. He knew of Cartman’s crush on him for a while, but the actual solidification of Cartman’s feelings was not something he expected the other to say. 

Kyle looked at Cartman for a second before he crawled forward, pressing his body against Cartman’s torso. It was warm, and welcoming, and shocking, but in the way that he allowed it to consume him. Cartman wrapped his arms around Kyle’s waist, pulling him.

“This is kind of fucked up.” Kyle whispered. Cartman made a similar hum that vibrated from low in his gut.

“We can’t allow ourselves to screw this up, Kyle.” Cartman said. “I’m sure as hell not going to allow it.”

“You should pretty confident about that.” Kyle chuckled, feeling Cartman’s fingers drum against his ribs.

Kyle was waiting for Cartman to say something back, but when the silence replied instead, Kyle waited for it, as his eyes started to drift in a faint haze. 

He could use a little more fucked up in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and feedback appreciated!


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